23.9.11

Privileges

Yesterday reminded me why I love college. I have so many smart things to say I don't even know where to begin. Actually, that's not true, I know exactly where to start...

Grey's Anatomy last night was great. I love Fall TV!

Okay, so I was going to write all of this down yesterday when it was fresh on my mind, but since I got the TV for two hours, Bart got the computer and then after i went to bed because I had to get up really early this morning because I left a very expensive recorder from one of my classes at school ( no worries, I found it! ) so this may or may not be as great as I was imagining it in my head.

First thing, in my history class we learned about this thing called "Treating" it's something young women did in the early 1900's. They would have men buy them things, take them to dinner or to a show, in exchange for sexual favors. They claimed this wasn't prostitution because they NEVER accepted cash or money, just gifts. Basically, it was a way for young women to experience the world they couldn't afford.

Sounds interesting right? To me, this sounded familiar, if the roles were reversed. Now, I am not talking about everyone, or even the majority when I talk about this, but it did remind me kind of what guys expect these days with dating. Now obviously growing up in Utah, very few (if any) guys expected sex, but there is obviously other "sexual favors" than just sex. Some guys take girls out and buy them things, expecting something later. Am I wrong? I don't think so. Again, I am not saying that guys take you out to dinner and then expect to get laid, but I do think that after so many dates, guys do expect something ( I don't blame them).

Example: In hair school I went on a few dates with this guy because he was friends were other guys who my friends liked (typical). I wasn't attracted to him, didn't even really like him as a friend, but I hung out with him to help my friends out (heartless I know.) So this kid offers to take me to a Jazz v. Lakers playoffs game, I said sure why not, but then he shows up to my school with a brand new Jazz jersey (the legit kind that cost a lot). Now, if that had happened to me now I wouldn't have accepted that gift, because of course he expected something from me later. I had to be very clear that just because he bought me this, and took me to a game, doesn't mean I get to be his girlfriend, or that he even gets a kiss at the end of the night. He wasn't too happy about that.

So, the Treating that went on in the 1900's is kind of like dating now. I am not saying it is right or wrong, but I just find this true. Both men and women go on dates with expectations, obviously those expectations are on a continuum and it differs for everyone. I am not judging how the dating game is, because I participated in the dating game, I just found it interested that Treating is where is all started.

Okay, so second thing. I have this Thursday night class that I am really starting to love. It's called Diversity and Health, which is a pretty vague description of the class, and I don't know what exactly we will be talking about all year, but last night we had a pretty cool lesson.

So with this kind of subject matter, there is potential for the professor to have an agenda, and try to make students see everything her way. Professors tend to claim unbiased feelings toward a subject, but are hypocritical with what they teach (Professor Brenda Cooper comes to mind). Anyway, this professor isn't like that.

We were talking about Privilege last night, White Privilege and Men's Privilege. Now first, before I go on, I just want to clarify the kind of privilege we were talking about because I think it is important. This Cultural Privilege is something that you are born with. There is nothing you did or didn't do to deserve/not deserve something. It's just the fact of what circumstances you were given when you were born....and there is nothing wrong with that. 

So first I am going to talk about White Privilege only because it ties in nicely with what I really want to talk about with men's privilege. So when you are white in the united states, you don't have to ever really think about your race/ethnicity, (until you are in a room where whoa, you're the only white person.) There is noting innately wrong with that, it's just how the US culture is. And yes, I can say, as a white person, that this is true. I never have to think about my race when it comes to why something did or did not happen to me.

Men have the privilege of safety, and I will explain to you what I mean. For the longest time I thought I was the only woman that was scared of being by myself in a dark place, walking outside alone, etc. Apparently I'm not. The professor had us all raise our hands if we knew what she was talking about. Everything from how we hold our keys as we are walking out to our car when it's dark, to where we check before we get into the car, to having someone walk us to our door/car. Even one that I have done a dozen times: When one friend walks the other to her car, then the first friend gets in, and the other takes her to her car where ever it is, so that girl doesn't have to walk alone.

Sounds crazy right? If you are a girl, I don't think it does. I had no idea that most girls are afraid of getting attacked/raped just as much as I am. And the crazy thing about all of this? Men in the class had NO IDEA what we were talking about. They were all so confused, saying they just kept their keys in their pockets and "oh, is that why when I am walking behind a girl when it's dark she will run into a building or walk away from me?" (Yeah dude, that's why). They were so oblivious to the fear women have, it blew my mind. It's not like I was expecting them to understand or have those same fears, it just surprised me how much they DIDN'T know/understand.

So I guess it's like being a white person in the united states when you don't have to think about your race for the most part. Men, don't really have to think about how safe or unsafe they are in most situations.

I don't know why I found this so FASCINATING. but I totally did. And I am surprised if anyone is still reading, I just needed to write this all down before I forgot all the smart stuff going on in my brain.

20.9.11

Happy Day

What a beautiful day!

Now I know what you are thinking, what the heck is wrong with me right? Am I dying? Did a win a cool prize? No, believe it or not, I am just in a good mood and am actually going to blog about it! Go me.

Maybe it's just the fact that I can actually walk and do regular things without dying from the pain. I went to classes today and they were just as lame as usual but hey, at least I could get to them right?

Things on my mind today

SHeDAISY: I have loved them since I was like 8 years old and I still jam out to them, singing every word. 


The nice blue sky and breeze

My Linguistics professor is really smart, but she really really sucks at teaching. Also, there is a creepy kid in that class that just stares. He doesn't just stare at me, even though that is what creeps me out, but he just stares at everyone...he's weird. 

I really hope this body glue on my incisions goes away fast because it's really itchy...really really itchy.

Grey's Anatomy starts Thursday!!!!!!!! Can't wait. Also, I am not on the HIMYM bandwagon yet...sorry guys.

Pizza is God's gift to earth.

18.9.11

Hiccups

So you probably don't know this, but having hiccups after abdominal surgery is pretty painful. Laughing, coughing and sneezing are all painful too, but hiccups suck because you don't really know when they are coming so you can't control them at all...I wasn't going to blog about hiccups, but they started as soon as I pulled up a new post page so.....here I am, blogging about hiccups.

What I really wanted to say tonight was that sometimes I hate technology and wish that it wasn't around. I also hate football season. Yes, you heard me, I hate football season. Shocker I know, and I also know how some of you couldn't imagine your life without football season, but I am not one of those people (And I am sorry if this post doesn't make sense, this hiccups are totally throwing me off). The fact that you can turn on the TV at 8 a.m. and watch football until 9 at night is stupid and I hate it.

I don't hate football because I don't know what's going on, because I do. I understand 90% of the game. I can tell what is going on when I am watching it, but that doesn't mean I enjoy it. I also like watching Utah State play, mostly because I still consider that my school and I have some attachment to it. So yes, I hate football season, but I am also excited for the Homecoming game next weekend, and there is nothing wrong with feeling those two things.

Anyway, that's all I had to say. I am not really tired enough to go to sleep so I figured I would say stuff, but then these damn hiccups showed up and I can't focus on writing anything.


Oh, and I really really really miss sleeping on my tummy...I need that to be a possibility again ASAP.

16.9.11

The Novel of My Life

So even though it is 6 a.m. and it pains me (literally) to have this laptop placed on the top of my legs, I really need to blog because I have been in this same spot since 2:30 p.m. yesterday, which yes, is a long time. I of course have gotten up to pee (with Bart's help) and I took 2 walks out to the front room (with Bart's help) but that is about all the moving I have done. Great news though, I am able to walk the 12 steps to the bathroom by myself now so that's a happy thing, for Bart too I am sure. Oh, and I may or may not be on drugs right now...so don't judge my megan-is-high-so-she-is-rambling post.

I honestly didn't think having surgery would be this big of a deal. I guess because the only surgery patient I have seen was Bart when  he got his shoulder worked on, and he was good to go an hour after he was brought back, and a day after he was home he was feeling pretty good.

Definitely not current situation. I'll start at the top because 1. I have time to talk about all this B. I don't have anything else to do BUT talk about it because I can't find a good show to watch and 3. I am going to flatter myself and think you people actually care about all this. :)

So I get prepped for surgery and they take me up to my O.R. I then sit out in the hall chillin by myself for like an hour because when the chick left me there were still people in the O.R. (patient included) so they had to clean it and all that good stuff. So I lay in wait, singing primary songs in my head to calm myself down ( I need to learn more primary songs). Finally, a nurse and the anesthesiologist came over to chat with me, and took me inside. I then remember switching beds...but that's it when it comes to the actual surgery part.

The recovery room is where the action really began. All I remember is waking up and freaking the hell out. I couldn't see anything, my eyes wouldn't focus at all and I still had a breathing mask on, oh, and I was hyperventilating like no one's business. I had absolutely no control over it for a while and that freaked me out the most. The nurse kept yelling at me (yes, yelling) to stop breathing fast and try to "blow out the candles" but I couldn't! I am just really happy Bart wasn't in that room to see me because I feel like it would have been kind of a scary thing to watch. The mean nurse also kept yelling at me to stop itching my face, and to stop crying (even though I never cried, I was just breathing like it). The poor nice doctor came over to see how I was feeling and as soon as he touched my leg my little freak out session started all over again...Not my best moment. 

Moving right along (if you are still reading...bless you)

So when I finally come back to real life, they take me to my room and I all of a sudden realize that it hurts....really bad. My stomach from my belly button, all the way around the right side to my back was (and still is) on fire. I think I started crying at that point -still clearly high on anesthesia- and when Bart asked how I was doing I told him to not talk to me for a minute because I knew I would bust out the water works. That next minute though I told him to not make fun of me (he wasn't) and then I started crying..this was a weird day people I am telling you. Later I really had to pee but the nurse was taking a minute so I told Bart he better not make fun of me if I peed the bed ( I didn't) and I started crying again..

It took about 3.5 hours in that last room until I was able to sit up long enough without falling over, or potentially barfing up all 2 crackers I was allowed to eat, so I could go home. yay! Except that I still really hurt, can't move at all, and my throat really hurts, no doubt from the tube down my throat and my hyperventilating after.

Bottom line? Major abdominal surgery is a little different than shoulder surgery I am realizing...

The great news though? Bart fed me a few bites of his Mac and Cheese last night, something I haven't been able to eat for a few weeks, and it was the greatest thing of all time. Bart's mom also brought over a yummy edible fruit arrangement, and my momma brought some chicken noodle soup.

14.9.11

Stupid September



So...not to be a Debbie Downer or anything, but I think September is going to suck.

I have to have surgery tomorrow (which is good, because that means I can stop being paranoid about what I can eat.....and I can actually eat). So surgery is a good thing, the recovery isn't going to be.

The doctor said expect about a week, but even after that I will be tired and sore and hating life...okay cool. Well I have already missed days at school, and will be missing at least two more and that is what stresses me out. I learned the hard way that missing class is NOT what you should do, but it looks like I will be missing a lot of September classes.

I am hoping that since it is early in the year, I will be able to catch up. I just won't miss any classes after September, that's a good goal right?

Also, I just finished watching seasons 3-6 of Grey's Anatomy (which has totally messed with my mind) so I dont have anything to watch during all of this down time I will be having! I didn't plan that very well that's for sure.

At least I planned it well when it comes to football (right Bart?!?) I should be good to go for USU's Homecoming, and then we are planning on going to the USU BYU game at the end of the month - I am not totally psyched for this, mostly because Bart is a little ridiculous when it comes to BYU so I dont' know how much fun will be happening during that game- 

Either way, my surgery is on a by-week so GO ME! 

p.s. I need something cool happen so my blog can stop being so lame. My apologies. 

7.9.11

Fat Free

So I am sick right? Currently my Gallbladder wants to attack me from the inside out, and the worst part of it all so far besides the pain?

The fact that we just spent $50 at the grocery store and every single item was fat free. 

That stupid cart was full of fat free yogurt, apples, applesauce, jello, rice, skim milk, rice cakes, and fat free dressing for all the yummy yummy salad I will be eating.

Now usually I like these things, these are things I would buy anyway, it's the fact that I HAVE to buy them now, the fact that I physically can't eat anything else.

Guess what I have eaten today?
Dry cereal
Grapes
Strawberries
Tuna Fish (with no dressing or anything added, just strait tuna fish from the can)
Plain rice
and some lettuce with salsa on it because Bart was sweet enough to try to give it some flavor.


If this effing disease doesn't make me skinny I don't know what will.

6.9.11

Adventures of the ER

I need to stop watching Grey's Anatomy.

So I have had stomach pain since June right? I have been to my doctor and given medicine for an ulcer that never really worked.

Finally last night my stomach started attacking me from the inside, awful pain so we finally went to the ER around 10. It was really busy and we waited for like an hour and by the time it was my turn my stomach stopped hurting a little bit and they said it was even a longer wait, so I acted like a bitch to everyone (except Bart, because he's the bomb) and stormed out of there.

We went to bed, but at 1 this morning the pain came back "with a vengeance" as Bart put it.  Finally around 4 a.m. after an ultrasound and some lovely lovely morphine, the doctor told me I have gallstones and need surgery. I also can't eat anything with fat in it. I told Bart that at least God knows my limits... - I can give up high fat foods, but I would never be able to give up sugar-

We had some interesting neighbors though, the cream of the crop here in Murray. The first guy was a paranoid crazy person saying that his identity has been stolen and the FBI need to get involved. He also was CONVINCED his mother-in-law poisoned him, or drugged him, or something crazy like that. He was pretty fun to listen to. Our other neighbor wasn't so fun. She would scream out in "pain" every few minutes. Loud, annoying not real screams. I told the nurse giving me morphine that maybe he should go give that to her just so she will shut the hell up.

So anyway, here I am, watching Grey's Anatomy, which I should stop doing because the whole time I was there this morning I kept imagining all the drama that was going on in the hospital. I was also taken care of for a while by a Resident, and I totally know what that is, so anyway, I need to stop watching Grey's Anatomy and thinking it is real life. I will just stay here and eat my strawberries, grapes and dry cereal, and wait until I am in pain again to take some lovely lovely pain medicine.

3.9.11

Labor Day Fun

1 Cabin
4 Couples
6 Boys under the age of 8
1 Hot Tub
400 dollars in food
3 Days
=

Good times!

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