Ugh. You guys! I'm really struggling with Mckenzie. My journal entry last night starts "I feel like a failure of a mother. I yelled at Kenny today". I always knew patiencs was a weakness of mine, but God is making it abundantly clear that it's something I need to work on, like meow.
Obviously I love my daughter. I really really love her. But when she whines and screams for no apparent reason? For 3 weeks straight? My deep breaths are only going so far to help. I'm sure her behavior is totally normal and typical for a 16 month old. I understand she is learning and growing and figuring out boundaries. I get that she's frustrated that she knows what she wants, but can't communicate.
I hear you.
I get it.
It still really sucks and is really irritating and I am just so so happy when bedtime comes every.single.day.
Luckily she isn't sick anymore, so her behavior and attitude have improved .00008%. We were even able to go for a walk today -something she hasn't wanted to do for weeks. We were outside for almost an hour and she was her happy fun self. We walked around and explored and kicked rocks and crunched leaves. And it was so fun! I was legitimately enjoying being with her for the first time in a looong time. And then toward the end she threw herself down on the grass and screamed and threw a fit.
It was nice while it lasted.
So tonight in my prayers I will say sorry for losing my patience and thank you for a 6pm bedtime.
and then try again tomorrow.