Finally a day off! It has been a busy week but I think every customer read my last post about tips because I got pretty hooked up after Monday....
I have 234908 things to do today but here I am still chillin in my PJ's playing Spider Solitaire. Usually I dominate at S.S. but I am sucking it up this morning and I am actually getting pretty upset about it. Every time I realize I am about to lose I get SO angry. I need to figure out how to control my emotions a little more I think!
I am heading down to Salt Lake/Utah County later today which I'm very excited about because I miss my family (typical)
It has been so crazy to see how much more important my family is to me ever since moving out. When I first moved to Logan in November of 08 I got soooo homesick. I probably cried every night for a month and then it was improved to maybe every other day. I called my mom EVERY day and usually after we got off the phone I would cry because I missed her ( which still happens sometimes) I would drive the 2 hours there as often as I could because I hated Logan so much. It wasn't like I was trying to be all negative and not give a new place a chance it was just really hard for me. I thought it would improve and get better but it didn't for a long time.
I would have moved home in like Feb but my mom wouldn't let me drop out of school in the middle of a semester. Instead, she bought me a plant to remind me of my house back home and told me to stick it out. ( "Bloom where I have been planted" were her words of wisdom for me) By June of 09 I told myself that if I didn't start liking it by the end of Fall semester I would leave because at least then I had given it one year and I wouldn't feel like so much of a quitter...Well last July I met some great friends that changed my whole perspective on Logan and so here I am, still here, and planning on staying until I am finished with school.
Whenever I have a bad day I write in my journal, sometimes I write in it when I have had a good day but I usually have more to say when it hasn't been good. Looking back and reading old entries (which I love to do) I wrote in my journal pretty much everyday from Nov 08 - July 09. It was kind of depressing reading it but I also realized how much I grew as a person from all of that time alone. It's funny though because as soon as I met my friends that Summer there is one entry talking about them and then no entries for a while. I was starting to like my life again and that was apparent through my journal entries. There would be a few here and there but I wasn't being all emo in them like the previous ones. I don't think those people realized and probably still don't realize how much they changed my life for the better. Even though I don't see them much anymore, I will always love them for helping me through a time when I haven't felt more alone.