Hi baby,
A few months ago I told you all about the boys you will meet in your life and lately I have been thinking of the kind of girls you will meet too.
Growing up a girl is hard. (I'm sure growing up a boy is hard too, I just don't have any good stories for that topic). What I experienced isn't what every girl experiences and just like the boys I told you about, I am sure you will find your own categories of people one day.
Your first real friend
You will be young. You and this girl will have tea parties (or soccer games) and me and her mom will be buddies. You will run over to her house without shoes on and she will come join us for family parties. Even after we move you away (or they move) you will think of her as your BFF for a while. Eventually her memory will fade, but you will always have a special place in your heart for her.
The first real mean girl
My first meal girl came in the form on a panties-under-the-leotard-wearing mean girl in ballet class. She was bigger than me and she pinched me. We would get in formation and she would find her way next to me. I quit ballet. You will probably be young when you meet this girl too. I hope you don't let her stop you from doing what you love. You'll be confused and won't understand why she is being mean. I don't understand it either little one, but sometimes girls can just be mean
The girl who is friends with your friend
As you get older your friends might have other friends that you don't really play with. That's OK. It's okay to have a lot of different friends and play with lots of different girls. You might feel a little jealous that this girl gets to have sleepovers and you don't. or maybe this girl has nicer clothes and shoes than you do. It's okay. You are no less of a friend, you are just different. And that's beautiful.
The other mean girls
Like I said, girls can be mean. They are jealous little creatures that attack any girl with confidence and pride in themselves. I was lucky to grow up in a family that taught me to love myself and be kind to others. I also had my own personality and style. Unfortunately that didn't always translate well at school. Girls will be mean, and if you aren't mean back, they will keep being mean. If I could give you one piece of advice it would always always be "be kind to others". Mean girls will come back later in life and tell you that they are sorry for how they acted. Never live your life so you have to apologize to someone later. Stand up for yourself and what you believe in, and never ever stoop down to their mean girl status.
The girl who makes you laugh and cry
This friendship will be the best and the worst thing in your pre-teen/teenage life. When you're getting along you are inseparable. You laugh and tell each other your secrets and dreams and spend countless hours together. Then this girl might just randomly get mad at you for "doing something". You will never really understand what you "did" to make her mad. You might apologize and try to make things better and eventually you two will become BFF's again. This is a confusing friendship and a toxic one. Eventually this friendship will end because (as you will learn) true friends don't treat you like this. True friends don't use you like a pawn in their life and they aren't your friend only when it's convenient for them.
The girl you think has everything
She doesn't. I promise. Don't compare your life, your body or your personality to hers. She is perfect just the way she is, and you are perfect just the way you are.
The girl that makes you doubt yourself
This girl might not be as pretty as you, or as confident as you. She has insecurities that go way beyond your friendship, but they will seep into your life if you let them. She won't be happy for your successes and fun stories. That really awesome date you went on? She will seem uninterested and jealous. When it's just the two of you things might be great, but when you shine, she doesn't. This isn't a true friend either my love. You will eventually see that being around a girl like this does nothing for you or your life.
The girl that has some pretty serious issues
In my life it was an eating disorder. A very public eating disorder that was very hard for me to deal with. I don't know what your friend will be going through, but I am sure you will have one like this. Baby girl I'm not saying don't be friends with girls who are struggling. I had other friends who had the same problems, but they weren't destructive to my life. Chances are you can help them and change their life for the better...just don't sacrifice yourself trying. Listen to them, talk with them, tell your parents about them and see if they can help- but don't ever let their bad habits or struggles become something you deal with too.
The girl who lets you be who you are and helps you be better
This will be a lifelong friend for you. She is happy when you are happy, and tries to make you feel better when you are sad. She is confident in her own skin and life to be able to appreciate yours. Don't be jealous of this friend and turn into the girl I mentioned earlier. It's OK to have separate lives and still be friends. She will make you a better person and a better friend. Her example will teach you how to treat others. Cherish her friendship and give it the attention it deserves.
xoxo
Mom
29.5.14
Reading List: The Time Keeper, The Last Lecture, Reconstructing Ameila
Just to get all caught up, here are a few more books I have read that you might want to add to your summer reading list!
As soon as I got done reading "The 5 People You Meet in Heaven" by Mitch I started looking for more of his books. Once I find an author I like I usually read all their stuff (cough cough Jodi Picoult cough cough). This was another quick read for me. The man who invents time (back in the time of the tower of babel) is cursed and left immortal until he helps two people in present day accept their life with the time they have. Moral of the story? Man has taken the concept of time and has turned it into an obsession. It's not laid out in a typical story format, but I liked reading something different from what my brain was use to. I think Mitch is a brilliant author and his stories leave you thinking.
The Time Keeper- Mich Albom
As soon as I got done reading "The 5 People You Meet in Heaven" by Mitch I started looking for more of his books. Once I find an author I like I usually read all their stuff (cough cough Jodi Picoult cough cough). This was another quick read for me. The man who invents time (back in the time of the tower of babel) is cursed and left immortal until he helps two people in present day accept their life with the time they have. Moral of the story? Man has taken the concept of time and has turned it into an obsession. It's not laid out in a typical story format, but I liked reading something different from what my brain was use to. I think Mitch is a brilliant author and his stories leave you thinking.
The Last Lecture- Randy Pausch
After telling my mom how much I enjoyed The Time Keeper she loaned me this book. It really doesn't have anything in common except that I enjoyed this book just as much (if not more) than the other! The premise is kind of sad: Randy has been given a few months to live after his cancer returns. He has three small children he will be leaving behind and he wanted to leave words of wisdom and life lessons for his kids since they probably won't remember him. The book is filled with great little stories of his life and career and the lessons he learned along the way. It's like a self help book for people who hate self help books! It's not pushy or preachy, he just makes a few really good points. I teared up/cried at a few parts when he talks about his wife and leaving her behind (thinking of Bart dying gets me crying every.single.time). Since I read this book pregnant, I thought about my daughter through the whole thing and what life lessons I would want to pass on to her. This is a great book to read at night to unwind and leave you feeling like tomorrow will be a better day.
Reconstructing Amelia- Kimberly McCreight
This book reminded me of a Jodi Picoult book but maybe not as buttoned up. Jodi Picoult has the ability to hold me on until the very last page. With this book I was more interested in the first half. It's about a high school girl who appears to have committed suicide but as her mom looks closer into her death, secrets come out that maybe lead to other conclusions. It's the dark and twisted world of a teenage girl and it struck a cord with me since in 13 years I will have a teenage girl myself...It's like Mean Girls meets Gossip Girl plus something else all together. Reading this made me wonder how I can teach my own daughter to not get caught up in the crap that peer pressure brings! Anyway, off my soap box....it was an entertaining story idea but there is a twist I wasn't a fan of.Reading List: The Guardian, Paper Towns, Heaven is for Real
If you know me you know I love to read. Bart binge watches TV series on Netflix; I binge read books. If I really love a book I will have it read within a day or two. Sometimes it takes less than 24 hours. One of my goals for 25 Before 25 was to read 12 new books this year. Halfway through and I have read 7 (ish...I feel like I'm missing one on my list but whateves).
Instead of going through all 12 books at the end of the year I just want to review them as I read them. I have a bit to catch up on buuuut....here's the first few reviews in no particular order:
Instead of going through all 12 books at the end of the year I just want to review them as I read them. I have a bit to catch up on buuuut....here's the first few reviews in no particular order:
The Guardian by Nicholas Sparks
OK OK I know what some of you are thinking. Nicholas Sparks? Really Meg? To be honest this was the first book I read of his, my mother in law left it over and I was in between books and had it finished within a few days. It was an easy read and it had a pretty sweet story. It was around the time we adopted Aggie and this book is all about a woman and her guardian angel aka pet dog. The love story was meh. There's a crazy stalker guy thrown into the mix. There were a few plot twists and in the end I finished it feeling entertained.
Paper Towns- John Green
Unless you have been living under a rock you have heard about "The Fault in Our Stars" by John Green. My bookie (kinda like foodie but for books...get it?) friend Chelsey mailed that book to me at least a year and a half ago and I fell in love with it. I always like to binge read books from the same author so I picked up Paper Towns. To be honest I didn't like this one very much. I thought the first chapter was the most entertaining and after that I was bored. It's about a typical boy in love with a mysterious and bad ass girl...who goes missing. The search for the girl just took waaaay too much time and my interest was lost.
Heaven is for Real- Todd Burpo
We were giving away movie tickets to see "Heaven is for Real" on the show one week and everyone brought up the book. I hadn't even heard of it before, but our sweet receptionist loaned me her copy for the weekend. I think I had this read within 12 hours. Totally fascinating and I would recommend it to anyone! It's about a little boy who has a near death experience, and after it's all said and done he starts talking about his experience with Jesus up in heaven. His dad is a preacher and draws parallels with stories from his son to stories in the Bible. I think of myself as a spiritual person, and I absolutely believe Christ and Heavenly Father love their little children enough to be with them during hard times (aka life threatening health problems). To hear this little guy's story made me think long after I finished the short book. It's an easy read but it will have you thinking of your own perceptions of heaven and the afterlife. I didn't feel like any of the doctrine I believe in was questioned, but it was one of those books that left me thinking.
22.5.14
Hi Baby: 28 weeks
Hey Baby,
I woke up to you having a little dance party in my belly this morning. It was right before the alarms went off and I was adjusting (again). I turned onto my back for a minute (because I love lying on my back but apparently that's against the rules) and you just started going crazy. You were moving and kicking and adjusting for 10 minutes straight and I loved every minute of it. I grabbed daddy's hand and he felt you moving too saying "that's my baby". I miss feeling you move when you have a quiet day, feeling you in there is so comforting.
I woke up to you having a little dance party in my belly this morning. It was right before the alarms went off and I was adjusting (again). I turned onto my back for a minute (because I love lying on my back but apparently that's against the rules) and you just started going crazy. You were moving and kicking and adjusting for 10 minutes straight and I loved every minute of it. I grabbed daddy's hand and he felt you moving too saying "that's my baby". I miss feeling you move when you have a quiet day, feeling you in there is so comforting.
Daddy set up your crib tonight! I am so excited. I am hoping this crib will inspire me to get your room ready. We still haven't bought a single thing, can you believe it? Your mom is a recovering shopaholic so I usually avoid going into places other than grocery stores :) I think it's time I start making my way to the baby section....
I can't wait to meet you and see your sweet face! We have 11 weeks to go and I will be counting them down.
I love you little one. Stay strong and keep growing
Xoxo
Mom
20.5.14
Poolside baby bump
Plus who doesn't like a good tan? Maybe my bump will be more endearing if it's not glow in the dark white. Making sense of a miracle is almost impossible. So instead of making sense of it all I will just slip *squeeze* into my suit, grab my hat and enjoy feeling my daughter kick me on these plastic chairs. (Apparently she wasn't comfy. Welcome to poolside seating my love)
16.5.14
3 Years
Bart and I celebrated our third anniversary on Wednesday. And by celebrate I mean text each other funny memes all day since I was out of town for work. I didn't get home until really late Wednesday night. I was exhausted. I walk in to see flowers and a darling note on the table. It said the sweetest things and I may or may not have cried as I read it. It defines the last 3 years perfectly. Bart is the most sensitive and caring person I know. He is so thoughtful and sweet and I love every minute of it! He knows exactly what I need to feel better.
Here are a few posts looking back on our wedding and our anniversaries. I can't say enough good things about the man I married, so I will just leave it at that!
Wedding Day Pics
One Year Later
Year Two
Here are a few posts looking back on our wedding and our anniversaries. I can't say enough good things about the man I married, so I will just leave it at that!
Wedding Day Pics
One Year Later
Year Two
Summer Lovin'
Yesterday I got a little sneak peek of what I am in for this summer and let me tell you...I'm a bit scared!
I was so freakin hot and uncomfortable the entire day. My jeans were too tight, my shirt was too tight, my feet hurt and I was having a constant heat flash all day. My hips were sore and my skin was itchy. My bump is getting in the way now and I couldn't even tie my shoes. I was just not feelin' it. I wanted to punch a small child and hang out in my house butt naked sitting in front of a fan.
It was 75 degrees.
I might not make it through a Utah summer.
Poor Bart might not make it either! He was teasing me as we were getting ready for bed (which we do on a regular basis. Not mean, just fun and loving) but I ended up bursting into tears and bawling for a solid 30 minutes. This is the 3rd or 4th complete emotional breakdown I have had and it's kind of wonderful. I sleep perfectly afterwards and wake up the next morning feeling a little lighter. Those tears just release all the stress that has been building up and every few weeks it's filled to capacity. Bart just stares and grabs me tissues and water. It's pretty funny AFTER it happens.
Bart is a trooper and hopefully he still loves me in July.
I was so freakin hot and uncomfortable the entire day. My jeans were too tight, my shirt was too tight, my feet hurt and I was having a constant heat flash all day. My hips were sore and my skin was itchy. My bump is getting in the way now and I couldn't even tie my shoes. I was just not feelin' it. I wanted to punch a small child and hang out in my house butt naked sitting in front of a fan.
It was 75 degrees.
I might not make it through a Utah summer.
Poor Bart might not make it either! He was teasing me as we were getting ready for bed (which we do on a regular basis. Not mean, just fun and loving) but I ended up bursting into tears and bawling for a solid 30 minutes. This is the 3rd or 4th complete emotional breakdown I have had and it's kind of wonderful. I sleep perfectly afterwards and wake up the next morning feeling a little lighter. Those tears just release all the stress that has been building up and every few weeks it's filled to capacity. Bart just stares and grabs me tissues and water. It's pretty funny AFTER it happens.
Bart is a trooper and hopefully he still loves me in July.
7.5.14
26 down, 14 to go
14 weeks. 99 days to go. As Bart puts it "pregnancy is sooooo looooong!" (Read in man-whine voice)
As this point I would argue with that saying time is just flying by! Of course ask me in 70 days and I'm sure I will have my own whiny voice to add to his.
My non maternity shirts are too small but I'm in denial trying to wear them anyway. I embraced my maternity jeans weeks ago but I still have a hard time adjusting to this growing belly. I like it though, and I'm not ashamed to show it off. (but if you ask me if I'm having twins I'll punch you).
I have been very good the last 6 weeks ago doing Prenatal Pilates 5+ days of the week and walking when the weather is nice. I have hung up my running shoes for now. I haven't completely said no to sugar, but I'm no longer 'cheating' on gluten and yes, I'm eating plenty of vegetables! My appetite has died down significantly and I don't have any major cravings. I do like crushed ice though. Lots of crushed ice. OK, so maybe my craving right now is crushed ice....yep.
We still haven't bought anything for this little one yet. Haven't decorated the nursery or stocked up on baby essentials. I don't know when the desire to buy things will kick in...but I'm still waiting.
Sleeping is an adventure and my dreams are totally cray cray. I still don't like my body pillow! I'm sorry...Bart reminds me of that $75 mistake on a regular basis. For now, I just prefer using him as a body pillow.
I feel her more and more each day and I absolutely love it. Bart made sugarfree banana bread the other day and after 2 slices this chick was going crazy! Weird because it didn't have any sugar (just bananas and vanilla) but she was bouncing off the walls.
At the moment I don't mind being pregnant...maybe I even enjoy it most of the time? I just can't wait to meet this sweet little girl.
I have been very good the last 6 weeks ago doing Prenatal Pilates 5+ days of the week and walking when the weather is nice. I have hung up my running shoes for now. I haven't completely said no to sugar, but I'm no longer 'cheating' on gluten and yes, I'm eating plenty of vegetables! My appetite has died down significantly and I don't have any major cravings. I do like crushed ice though. Lots of crushed ice. OK, so maybe my craving right now is crushed ice....yep.
We still haven't bought anything for this little one yet. Haven't decorated the nursery or stocked up on baby essentials. I don't know when the desire to buy things will kick in...but I'm still waiting.
Sleeping is an adventure and my dreams are totally cray cray. I still don't like my body pillow! I'm sorry...Bart reminds me of that $75 mistake on a regular basis. For now, I just prefer using him as a body pillow.
I feel her more and more each day and I absolutely love it. Bart made sugarfree banana bread the other day and after 2 slices this chick was going crazy! Weird because it didn't have any sugar (just bananas and vanilla) but she was bouncing off the walls.
At the moment I don't mind being pregnant...maybe I even enjoy it most of the time? I just can't wait to meet this sweet little girl.
4.5.14
My education, career and motherhood
Today I saw a post in Facebook that not only pissed me off, but put me on my soap box about education, careers and motherhood.
Proverbs 4:7 Wisdom is the principal thing; therefore get wisdom: and with all they getting get understanding.
D&C 90:15 And set in order the churches, and study and learn, and become acquainted with all good books, and with languages, tongues and people.
D&C 131:6 It is impossible for a man (woman) to be saved in ignorance
Our minds are a beautiful gift from God and who are we to not use that gift? Getting a higher education doesn't take away from our divine calling to be wives and mothers. I believe for many of us, it will make us better.
This person said he found it interesting that all these Mormon women were graduating from college and talking about their future careers when the church they claim to believe in wants them to just stay home and be a wife and mother.
My short answer? Shut the eff up.
My long answer?
I challenge anyone to tell me my education, career and life experiences outside the home won't make me a better mother when my baby girl gets here.
The thing that really bothered me about this post was the misinterpretation of doctrine. Yes mothers are meant to be in the home raising their children (among other things). But I have never seen a conference talk or scripture that says women in the church shouldn't get an education. In fact, I have read plenty of things on the contrary.
Proverbs 4:7 Wisdom is the principal thing; therefore get wisdom: and with all they getting get understanding.
D&C 90:15 And set in order the churches, and study and learn, and become acquainted with all good books, and with languages, tongues and people.
D&C 130:19 And if a person gain more knowledge and intelligence in this life through his (her) diligence and obedience than another, he (she) will have to much the advantage in the world to come.
D&C 131:6 It is impossible for a man (woman) to be saved in ignorance
Our minds are a beautiful gift from God and who are we to not use that gift? Getting a higher education doesn't take away from our divine calling to be wives and mothers. I believe for many of us, it will make us better.
Our loving Heavenly Father is just as proud when his daughters walk across the stage and get their diplomas as he is with his sons.
I don't like to get into arguments on facebook or add to the attention these kind of people are clearly seeking. but if I did, I would have asked this question: What are righteous latter day women supposed to do in the time after high school and before marriage and having kids?
Are we just supposed to sit around in our parents basement waiting for some man to marry us and take care of us? Are we not supposed to have our own dreams and ambitions?
Getting married is a sacred commandment and I believe it's one you can't and shouldn't rush into. I have friends & family who are in their mid twenties and not married...are you saying if they were true believers of the church they wouldn't be getting an education and pursuing a career?
And what about other young women who are married and still getting an education? (like myself). Do you honestly think our job in this world is to stop everything we are doing and everything we have ever dreamed of doing and start popping out babies? How much more sexist can you be?
My third anniversary is coming up this month and I will be 3 months away from having our first child. By the time my baby gets here I will have a Cosmetology License with 7+ years experience and I will have my bachelors degree with 2+ years experience in my chosen career. Do you think God is angry or disappointed in me for finishing my education and getting established in my career before having children? Because I don't. I know he is very proud of me and the choices I have made. I also believe that everything I have learned in the years I spent NOT having kids is going to make me a better mother.
Yes, our divine birthright as women is to have children and raise them up in righteous and loving homes. But God is not a one sided or one-track kind of a guy. I can be a mother, wife, sister, daughter, friend, journalist and hair stylist and be entitled to all the blessings a mother is given.
So for every person who graduated this week: Congratulations. Live your life. Have dreams and babies and don't think for a second you have to choose between the two.
I don't like to get into arguments on facebook or add to the attention these kind of people are clearly seeking. but if I did, I would have asked this question: What are righteous latter day women supposed to do in the time after high school and before marriage and having kids?
Are we just supposed to sit around in our parents basement waiting for some man to marry us and take care of us? Are we not supposed to have our own dreams and ambitions?
Getting married is a sacred commandment and I believe it's one you can't and shouldn't rush into. I have friends & family who are in their mid twenties and not married...are you saying if they were true believers of the church they wouldn't be getting an education and pursuing a career?
And what about other young women who are married and still getting an education? (like myself). Do you honestly think our job in this world is to stop everything we are doing and everything we have ever dreamed of doing and start popping out babies? How much more sexist can you be?
My third anniversary is coming up this month and I will be 3 months away from having our first child. By the time my baby gets here I will have a Cosmetology License with 7+ years experience and I will have my bachelors degree with 2+ years experience in my chosen career. Do you think God is angry or disappointed in me for finishing my education and getting established in my career before having children? Because I don't. I know he is very proud of me and the choices I have made. I also believe that everything I have learned in the years I spent NOT having kids is going to make me a better mother.
Yes, our divine birthright as women is to have children and raise them up in righteous and loving homes. But God is not a one sided or one-track kind of a guy. I can be a mother, wife, sister, daughter, friend, journalist and hair stylist and be entitled to all the blessings a mother is given.
So for every person who graduated this week: Congratulations. Live your life. Have dreams and babies and don't think for a second you have to choose between the two.
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